colors of compassion (community, healing, retreat)

highlights from the weekend, beginning on friday, when i arrived...

• listened to sister auspicious bring dharma rain and stir oceanic consciousness obout mindfulness training number 4 on mindful speech and deep listening. storytelling about sisterhood upon the life transition of a friend and the women power and wisdom which arose from the remeberance of life.

• seeing brown faced friends in the crowd, particulary other flipbuddhas. :-) that was a nice surprise. there was this one ate from la, this kuya i sat next to inquiring that kind and interested: are you filipino question. then a friend brought her crew along from los angeles/orange county. that was cool. i think this year, i feel like i'mma B meeting more flipbuddhas near and afar. that is a very healing feeling for me to share in the dharma praktis with others from my ancestral community. happiness!!!

• saturday am: walking up after sleeping in the car (!!!) because i was too lazy (plus i got in late) to set up my tent. i adjust :) to backseat sleeping for the next evening too. but anyways, walking up in the morning and then walking meditation with thay down to the oakgrove and sitting around him, just in silence. nothingness, all beingness. and i kept waiting for the moment when i thought he would speak. i was all excited and expectant that we would have a dharma talk down by the oak grove and i guess we did. the dharma talk of shared peace and silence and enjoying that as a sangha. effortless, buddhaful, powerful, ease. my gratitude to my teacher.

• saturday dharma talk q&a: oh, dharma talk questions and answers was a full experience. folks went up to thay asking him very clear and direct questions about sexuality, disability, racism, anger, returning home and the ways of praktis. one kid was like: "do you like your job?" that was funny! the energy rose and calmed with each person. i distinctly remember one woman's question about the theme of the retreat and the need for clarification she was seeking about this "people of color" gathering. thay spoke on the issue of cultural sovereignty, cultural autonomy and not allowing the best parts of our ancestral cultures to be forgotten as we take home in new lands as "immigrants", displaced, diasporic, mobile communities. a tear or two was had hearing him speak so deeply about the preciousness of our cultural ways of life. one of the biggest things i've received from the praktis has been its insistence on returning home, coming back home, renewing the connection to our ancestors. my father's death early in my life felt like a big void in my life even as a young adult. i never felt i was able to recover from that or move past not having a father. through the praktis, i am now able to imagine as well as understand that my father and all my ancestors live within me in a very real way. that is how we continue to be with one another. to my father who watches over me as well as lineage of pinas ancestry that i possess, returning home for me has been about healing broken, detached, immigrant memory of having left the philippines. the recovery process of reclaiming is no longer such a big, unfathomable ideal. "because i am in you and you are in me...we are the ambassadors of our ancestors." so much to thank the praktis and friends showing me a better way to live this life...

later on saturday afternoon, community art project was started. OOOooOOOooh, that was too much fun. not to mention the Be In, shared performances and cultural sharings. impromptu "song or something" from the ucsd cross cultural center pamilya-sangha as we bobbed to "para sa isangmahal...ikalat muna" mantra :)


back to saturday afternoon after lunch:
walked up to the garden in solidity, and caught up with brother phap ngu. oh, saturday morning, sitting meditation, i sit right behind him and through the dimness of the meditation hall, i'm wondering if it's him and yes it was. i had heard he was back and saturday afternoon, we have an hour of sitting around the garden just catching up and talking about what he'd been up to. and then, to add to the reunion excitement, i see brother phap khi, dharma instrument brother. ha! he's a trip. i hope to see them again before they up and leave again. this time, less drama on my behalf with lettin' go.

onto saturday evening with Be In: highlights...
• black sista goes up to the mic and shares, "in my tradition, we make noise when we are happy!!!" and to this i just crack up at how she said what she did in the context of our silent claps as the evening's cultural sharings were taking place.

• sista wrote this piece inspired by poem, "bridge called my back".
• sang as a group with old friends initiated by inthelight247
• little ones started off the evening with a story about the buddha as a deer

• enjoyed and was really grateful for the work of brother tripp, who i met last year at the colors of compassion, older white man, supporting this retreat and the youth in appropriate, skillful ways by helping out with the costumes and getting young ones to participate in the play. i told him before i left sunday that i'd like to be in one of his productions and i hope that happens sometime this year...or something?!

learnings about how folks of color praktis the dharma - my generalizations...

• hmmm....what to say about this...